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Happy Christmas!
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So I've come down with a throat infection and I'm at home ill today. No point trying to make telephone calls when you can hardly be heard.

I went into the chemist in order to get some night nurse so that I can be better tommorow and go to work.

They've recently rearranged the shop to be more open and have therefore moved all the drugs they used to have behind the till on the shop floor. They are in cabinets but they are unlocked and the only adornment on them says "please close doors after use". There is nothing to say "pharmacist only, ask for assistance" or anything like that. To be fair they have also put all the painkillers, decongestants, plasters etc that used to be on the shop floor in there too.

So I go to get a packet of Night nurse out and the cashier starts shouting at me "CAN I HELP YOU! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" she does say "thank you for being understanding" at the end of the transaction but bloody hell! how about not being an asshole in the first place? How about investing in two signs saying to ask for assistance?

We go to the chemist because we need medicine... therefore patience is probably at an all time low... so don't be a douche about your own systems being uninformative.
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5 children less than 3 on one bus is too many. 

I hope that being able to hear a child crying / screaming / talking way too loudly and not wanting to kill them  is something that comes to you when you are pregnant with your own child.... if not then I need thicker earplugs.

Oh... and talking politics with the Mother in Law is almost as bad.  She seems to think that a new leading party could fix everything in a day if they were brought to power.  *sigh*
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1.  The bus is not your childs play toy.  Sit them in a seat and bloody stay there.  Don't allow them to change seats every five seconds. and wander up and down the stairs and give their toys to every one.

2.  If you get them out of the pushchair and they actually take up a seat then fold the damn pushchair up!  it is only supposed to take up a pushchair/wheelchair space when it is actually being used.  The other 5 mothers / wheelchair users who will be using the the pushchair as a chair will be grateful.

3.  Bring a dummy for young children who are prone to crying because they should have been home hours ago.  It may stop the rest of the passengers from trying to kill you or the child!

4.  Don't teach them the "press the bell" game.  The bell on the bus is only to let the driver know that someone wants to get off.  The reasons I don't want the children knowing this game is the following:
 a) They will try to press it all the damn time.  Children, especially toddlers, do not realise that a game only works for about 2 seconds of a 20 minite journey. 

b) When the first kid grows up and you teach the second kid the same game... you get a bell war.   Like the one I witnessed the other day between a 5 year old and a 7 year old:

They had just about got the bit about only being able to do it once during the journey.  Mum promised hte 5 year old she could press the bell when they were ready to get off.  The 7 year old then pressed the button about 30 seconds earlier than you would normally so He got to do it instead.  The five year old then screamed, hit her brother and started whining at Mum and the 7 year old started kicking the 5 year old and shouting at Mum about the 5 year old being a whiny little brat and hurting him...  Mum eventually drags the two of them of the bus whilst trying to wheel the pushchair containing the 18 month old younger sibling as well.  Ta Da: welcome to hell!!!


May. 5th, 2009 09:29 pm
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I've had a message up on my MSN messenger for days "after convention wipeout"... or at least thats what I thought I had written...

I had actually written "after onvention wipeout".  Doh!
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The above link is a link to google with lots of links about a sci fi convention taking a trip enmasse to Subway with Zachary Levi and  Adam Baldwin to show support for a third season of the show.

If you want to help the show get another series please take some of these links and post them to other sites  and blogs etc.  If you are in the US I think that tonight there is a scheduled delude on a number of sites over the US to help as well which you may be able to attend.  

Edit: Ok, so the day for the US visits was yesterday but you could still go and drop a note into the suggessions box anyway.

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I've had two clients be very upset by me chasing them for payment this week and accusing me of being very very agressive... when I wasn't.

I've had another customer who told me he would be able to give me payment details toward the end of March suddenly delay that to the end of April.  When I tried to tie down why whilst on a telephone call he ended up telling me I was accusing him of lying (I wasn't, I was just trying to clarify why he couldn't access paperwork) and calling me rude and hanging up on me.

Oh, the joys of credit control!
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I don't mind travelling by public transport.

Not even when peiple can't keep their conversations to themselves.  Not even when they play music without headphones.

But I have one Bug Bear: Purfume! 

Who in the hell gets up in the morning and looks at their bottle of purfume on and says "I know, I'll put enougth on that everyone in the town can smell it!".  I swear they must be using a bottle a day!

I swear I get one or two a month who think this is a good idea.  And they always sit directly next to or in front of me. Especially when I can't move to another seat.

I got into work this morning with headache, breathing problems and itching/burning eyes.  after taking allergy pills and painkillers I spent half the morning trying to stay awake.

My eyes were stilll itching when I got home.  Luckily after a long shower they have calmed down again. 
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Slightly NSFW Words in image )

I really didn't look for it but I loled when I found it.

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You remember that I said my friend was due to propose to his girlfriend today?  Yeah, well it didn't go to plan.

He got to the place where we all meet for the sci-fi club and I asked him if he had the ring (which I'd dropped round the night before). 

He'd had it in his jacket pocket when he left the house.  IT WAS NO LONGER THERE.  An hour of retracing steps with me and another friend later and it was up to me to explain to his girlfriend why he would be giving her a joke shop ring rather than the one she was expecting.......

She's a keeper as she happened to have a ring of the right size that she owned in her bag and we used that one.  She also still said yes. 

I spent most of the hour of retracing his steps trying not to laugh at the situation as I knew the fiancee would find it a little funny too.

(p.s.  The ring was a Diamondeque one from QVC so wasn't expensive)

Edit: Someone posted regarding the rind being Diamondeque but its deleted for some reason.   The girlfriend especially wanted Diamondeque and didn't want an expensive ring.  She actually gave him a list of options from their range.

snow day!!

Feb. 2nd, 2009 11:58 am
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I got halfway to work this morning before the bus hit a car (no one was hurt) and we were told a lorry had overturned on the A345. Had to turn back and come home which took about an hour more that it normally would have

Thank goodness my new boss was understanding about the fact I couldn't get in on my first day!
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Its been two hours and I haven't heard anything from Alan regarding the meeting about the possible redundancy.

New Dr Who

Jan. 3rd, 2009 10:05 pm
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I'm surprised I'm the first on my friends page to post this...

/hes too young.
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They have recently started to roll out an energy saving setting on the Sky Boxes.

If you have had your Sky on for a number of hours - whether you have been changing channels or not it will put a message up on the screen
saying "you box is about to enter standby, press Backup to cancel".

If you do not cancel it it will switch off the box and go to black screen.  This is happened to us a few nights in a row recently, probably as I have been at home and therefore watching things.  Wey have therefore lost some of the program we are trying to record. 

You can turn this setting off in the menu.  Go into to System Setup and then Active Standby and turn the setting to OFF. 
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I went in to visit a employment agency today to register with them.   They said they would need to do some aptitude testing which was fine with me.

They put me on a Sage test (accountancy software for those who don't know).  I had three major problems:

problems behind cut for sanity reasons )

Therefore I only managed to get 24% correct when I knew how to do about 80% and could have guessed another 10%. 


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FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

4th November

RE: Christmas Party

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols...please feel free to sing along.

And don't be surprised if the Managing Director shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1.00 p.m.
Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over £10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets.

This gathering is only for employees! The Managing Director will make a special announcement at the Party.

Merry Christmas to you and your Family


FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

5th November

RE: Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we're calling it our 'Holiday Party.' The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians. There will be no Christmas tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.

Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family,



FROM; Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

6th November

RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table...you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only," you wouldn't be anonymous anymore!!!! How am I supposed to handle this? Somebody?

Forget about the gift exchange, no gift exchange allowed now since the Union Officials feel that £10.00 is too much money and Management believe £10.00 is a little cheap.



FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

7th November

RE: Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs, perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party - or else package everything up for you to take home in a little foil doggy bag. Will that work?

Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest to the toilets, Gays a re allowed to sit with each other, Lesbians do not have to sit with gay men, each will have their own table.

Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men's table, too.

To the person asking permission to cross dress - no cross dressing allowed. And No, no blow-up sheep.

We will have booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the food. We suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, the restaurant cannot supply "No Sugar" desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!


FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All F****** Employees

8 November

RE: The ******** Holiday Party.

Vegetarian pricks I've had it with you people!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death", as you so quaintly put it.

You'll get your f****** salad bar, including organic tomatoes, but you know tomatoes have feeling, too.

They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!!

Hope you all have a rotten holiday * drink, drive, and die!

The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FROM: John Bishop - Acting
Human Resources Director

9th November

RE: Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy recovery, and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.

In the meantime, Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and instead, give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd December off with full pay.

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I like the show.

I hate the damn 15 minites of ego pumping that they insert into the special effects program BBC run after each one.  Which my husband seems to think he has to watch or the world will cease to exist.

Its about 2 minites actually special effect information and 13 mins of "oh aren't we so wonderful, please watch whilst we make love to ourselves".


/rant over. 

oh crap

Oct. 19th, 2008 08:46 am
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I have an interview at 10am tommorow.

I have a sore throat and cold and can hardly speak today.

Anyone have any majorly good remedies that can cure a cold and sore throat in less than 24hrs?  All suggestions welcome.
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Its september.  So why is every channel on TV showing Christmas episode repeats???
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